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hyperhappa
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Name: linds
Birthday: 1/28/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: guitar and baking and finding buried treasure
Expertise: tying shoes
Occupation: Student
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message me
Member Since:
2/18/2003
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| thanks
for biting your tongue. 
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| To love someone in that holding-hands-when-you’re-80 sort of way. To look at a lined face and sun spots, grey hair and wrinkled skin, and see those beautiful eyes that don’t look quite the same, but have never really changed because all of the love and care and memories of the years gone by radiate out like warm rays of sunlight absorbing into your time-weathered skin and melting into your heart. I’m not saying anyone can forget those hard times, those rough patches, those bumps in the road, but afterwards, in the end, you are still holding hands, side-by-side, because nothing can tear apart two determined, self-sacrificing hearts. Perhaps I’m just a starry-eyed, idealistic fool, but whenever I see an old couple walking down the street holding hands looking snug as two bugs in a rug, I can’t help but smile and hope that 50 years down the line, I’ll be walking down the street with my love’s hand in mine.
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| yesterday someone close to me told me that a friend of theirs committed suicide. i had never really met him, but i had seen him. from what i've picked up, no one saw it coming. i kept thinking about it, and it really got to me. that someone could be hurt so much emotionally that they decide that the pain of living is too much to bear. death is so.. final.
i found myself wishing i could have talked him out of it. i found myself crying for a man i never knew.
he was young, he was beautiful, he seemed to be doing just fine. but he was dying inside.
as i sat on the couch staring out the window with tears in my eyes i thought.. maybe this is my calling.
maybe i'm supposed to be a psychologist, councelor, therapist.. for the severely depressed and suicidal.
that's no lightweight career path. i've been thinking about psychology and counceling as a field i'm seriously considering. i'll have to give it some more thought and look into what kind of work is actually available. i'm just afraid that in a field like that it would be difficult to detach oneself from work and not take things home.
but maybe this is it.
God Bless You. i didn't know you, but i feel that you are gone. | | |
| to be honest, it feels a little funky to be back at school. i wasn't ready for it when it came, and now i'm not quite ready for it to be over.
i didn't study much (at all) over break, like i had originally planned to. so now i have some catching up to do.
sb was fun. went to LA with vince to visit jen. thanks guys, good times. for a couple days after i got back from LA i didn't feel like doing much for a few reasons. felt drained, a little anxious, and a little distraught, but i bounce back like a 25 cent superball these days, so all is well and dandy now. i guess i can't take all the credit. some of the things that i thought were real bad just ended up being ok afterall.
on sunday i went with my dear lynn to try on prom dresses downtown. just for fun. there were some really pretty ones. prettier than the ones i wore to jp and sb. i think that for some girls, just feeling dolled-up and prettty is half the fun of those dances. after that, we went to see a one man play called emergence-see at this HS in elk grove. really good. very powerful. thanks lynn!
i started messing around with some chord progressions over break, too. and i like them, for once. we'll see what i can come up with from here.
hope everyone else has a fun spring break. | | |
| my spring break is this coming week. different from eeevvveeryone else's. except for others in state schools like aaron. i'm looking forward to it, of course, but it feels so early. i want to make this spring break a good one. i hope to go visit jen towards the end of next week, but i don't know who i can go with.
earlier in the year i was thinking it would be sweet to visit my cousin in NY, but seeing as how i don't have a job and would have to leech the cash outta my folks, i'm thinkin that won't work this time.
but i will definately get out to the bay just for a day trip at some point. havent been thereabouts in a while. long while. plus i need to go to japan town to buy a new pencil 
well.. i have the second part of my history midterm on friday, then i'm home free. byebyeboo
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